Thursday, July 30, 2009

quick update

this is for my ex boyfriend bc this is exactly how I feel

that and "good riddens to bad rubbish"

Monday, July 6, 2009

Getting Excited!

This is now my official training blog!

I have changed the name and will be adding a custom graphic as soon as I can.

tomorrow after work Im going to walmart to get my nike+ipod traning thing, and gonna have to find my old ipon nano in all my suite cases.

I just ordered this :

Its for the ipod+nike thing, but since I dont have a pair of nike shoes, I need this for the ipod thing to work.

Im aslo gonna get a pink ipod & nike sneakers as the training goes on, so I have them for the race :)

found a bunch of cute princess things here :

i thought this was a good thing to purchase once I get into running in the heat:

Disney Princess Half Marathon

The Disney princess half marathon is Friday, March 5 - Sunday, March 7, 2010!

241 days away, 241 days to drop about 60lbs and get in shape to run 13 16 minute miles. Im gonna do it! I thankfully am doing it with two of my best friends! I am trying to find a way to get a pic of the three of us, but i dont have one. so heres both of them with me :) (not sure they want their pics on here so I blacked out their eyes - both are wonderful, strong, beautiful, smart women who are athletically inclined. **I am not and yet all my best friends seem to be runners**

these are my two best friends and they are both serious runners and really enjoy running - I dont. walking 2 miles of the peachtree was hard for me.

but this race is for a wonderful cause, the MAKE A WISH FOUNDATION. so I plan to train very hard for it.

first Im going to cut down and eventually out Pepsi and coke and only drink diet. Im going to limit myself to one dessert item a day and try and eat 2 pieces of fruit and 2 veggie servings a day.

Im also going to invest in one of these :
and a good pair of running shoes :)

Ill start reporting on my progress asap

get pumped people!


Thursday, July 2, 2009

when is my ship coming in?

so im sitting here, thinking about all the things I do. I work hard, Im a good friend, I always try and be nice, I volunteer & yet im still up happy.

I keep finding more and more of my friends are happily engaged or married or have found someone wonderful. Im not saying they arnt good people, because they are, but it makes me really sad.

i know life isnt fair - some people get everything easy others have to work hard. & i know ive had a pretty good life so far, but it just seems like the more good I do in the world, the less the world gives back to me.

maybe im just being stupid and selfish or asking too much, but I dont feel that way. I guess Im just sick and tired of always doing the right thing, working hard, being a good friend, trying to meet nice guys, being good to those I meet & yet I still get treated like a second rate citizen.

I had a theater class this semester and I did all the PR and the bookings for the shows. I did 2x as much work as the other kids in the class but because I had a small part (which they assigned me) I only got a C in the class. How is that right? because they are all friends and graded everyone very highly. but since I wasnt in their "click" I got the short end of the stick.

IM not asking for perfection, or a million new friends - but just to have someone who would help me move without having to be bribed - that would be nice.
I have to move apartments in aug (very hot in south GA) so Im going to have to ask my friends to help me. In order to get even 1 or 2 people to show, Ill have to buy pizza and beer and offer all kinds of incentives, but when they need help moving, im there early & get maybe a thank you. how is that right?

i still live by "treat others the way you want to be treated" and I dont think thats too much to ask.

what I am asking is when is my ship gonna come in? cause I feel like im sitting on shore, & i keep seeing ships but they belong to everyone else. I just would like some small good things to happen to me - just get that little extra boost to help me keep going.

right now tho - it just feels like ill be waiting forever

just another day in "paradise"

im laying here on my bed exausted. ive just spent the say being yelled at by everyone, including my boss & now my mother. I woke up at 5.45am to no txts or missed calles or anything. I guess EMT is over me & has moved on to someone better.

so I worked from 7-12.45 with no breaks. I stared my day feeling very ill, and very very tired. My body is just at a breaking point - I survive till the weekend which I spend crying. Not very good for your physical or mental health.

so after a very long, discouraging day at work I come home completly spent. I get no support at work from my boss and I feel like I just constantly do wrong. Im always getting told how parents are emailing my boss to complain about stuff & it always seems to be my fault. Im doing my best, pulling 12 hour shifts every time I can to help keep the business open. Yes - I get paid but just hearing a "thanks" would also mean a lot to me.

so Im literaly about to just break down and cry about all this. It really feels as though my life is falling apart & theres nothing I can do. I work hard but it seems like I never get to play or relax. My heart feels like its been stomped on yet again and my body is at a breaking point. I really dont know what to do. On top of all that Im looking for some babysitting to help pay the bills and offered to colunteer at church. maybe im too over extended but it help me to keep busy.

so I come home. & when I say home its really just the place I stay - i sleep here & eat here but other then that I hardly ever home because Im working so much. so today I come home and im literaly about to fall over, Im just so beat down. My moms in the kitchen & Im talking about work. shes not listening just doing that "ummm hmmmm" that moms do. so I head upstairs to have a rest (aka right now) & my brother is all "how was work" & Im like "it sucked - i was up at freeking 5.54am" & of course being my brother he has to one up me and say ive been up for work earlier.

you have to know my brother. he was the all star kid in highschool in sports and school, was the #1 senior according to the AJC, hes a sigma nue at wake forest & is gonna be a dr or something. super handsom, perfect girlfriend - hes just the kid everyone wants to be. Im sure hes nice to everyone but he always has to mke me feel not good enough with his comments.

of course I was planning to come upstairs and cry about my horrible day but that just pushed me over the edge. when u feel like I do it doesnt take much. so my mom feels the need to come in and yell at me about the whole thing and say i should quit and go back to my apartment in statesboro.

**sorry - just feel asleep typing**

just having an all around horrible, no good, very bad day

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

"the ugly truth"

so I just watched a clip for "the ugly truth"

thats not the clip but it gives an idea - why cant I find a guy like that? i mean I need someone to help me with all my relationship problems. I just dont get where I go wrong.

yes - you guessed it, another almost week (last fri was the last time he called & he txted on sun nite) i heard from mind you hes been on facebook & okcupid & even looked at my profile since then - but still nothing. am I stupid for still wanting to belive hes just busy?
yes but i dont really care. guys like this dont just fall into your lap so Im willing to wait & make a major effort for this one.

moving on to better things - I worked 10+ hours today which is good because I made $100+ just today (I super need it). so I figured id make a little list of the things Im planning to buy with the $$ i make this summer

A much needed new laptop - hopefuly an apple :)

A new GPS - an ex boyfriend broke mine :(

A new iPhone 3GS

A new toy for myself

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